Blogosphere, blogosphere, where have you been?
I think I have found my new best friend.
For what reason you ask, I’ve got reasons galore,
In the interest of time, here I’ll give you four:
1) You make me feel good about me. Yes, You.
2) You teach me that placing value on parenting isn’t just an issue for mommies, it’s for daddies too.
3) You lure me in with your blogs and lead me to inspirational stories that demonstrate how being a mother—a parent—isn’t about our sexuality, it’s about loving our children and raising them as best we can.
4) You help me remember that I’m not alone in the challenges I face as a mother and you even make me laugh about it through your conversation!
Oh, thank you, thank you, dear blogosphere,
In my heart and on my internet toolbar I’ll keep you near.
Are you looking for a new friend, quite possibly another mom?
May I suggest you browse the web, start with blogher.com
Happy Blogging!
Friday, October 9, 2009
"Just a..." No More!
When talking about being a mom and that being enough, really, what we’re talking about is value. Is there value in being “just a mom?” Of course there is! So, why is it even being discussed or questioned? It is due to the fact that traditionally, caring for children has not been valued.
I found a “momversation” on momversation.com that addresses this very subject and it is truly a call to mothers out there to take pride and ownership in what they do.
I was particularly struck with the following statements:
I ask this question, if you don’t “own” it and place a value in it, how can we expect “they” will do it?
Mindy speaks the truth, it IS F-ing awesome and I say 'Amen' to her statements! I wish it were that easy, and that we could stop right there. We can’t though, we have to keep fighting the good fight until all mothers and fathers have the option to stay at home to raise their children and do so without fear of being “just a…”. Who’s with me?!
I love that this “momversation” exists and is out there in the universe. If more moms (and dads) jumped on this bandwagon, become more vocal about it and take pride in the fact that they are not “just a…” rather, they are a contributing member of society. They are contributing in a BIG way. Maybe when this happens, we may see a shift in how the universe sees the values.
That is a dream I won’t give up on.
“Few men in positions of authority have any firsthand experience caring for children and therefore no basis for understanding just how difficult and important a job it is. Their ignorance helps perpetuate a system that takes the work for granted." (The Price of Motherhood, Crittenden, p. 241)It’s time for mothers (and fathers), who see the value and choose to focus on the raising of their children, to band together and embrace the job they do. It is, after all hard work, very hard work, raising a child, let alone, multiple children.
I found a “momversation” on momversation.com that addresses this very subject and it is truly a call to mothers out there to take pride and ownership in what they do.
I was particularly struck with the following statements:
“You have to own what you do.” Cyndi Davis (napwarden.com)
I ask this question, if you don’t “own” it and place a value in it, how can we expect “they” will do it?
“It’s funny. I think we’re over thinking the problem…being a mom is F-ing awesome. It’s enough. It’s an incredible contribution. So I think we can stop right there.” Mindy Roberts ( themommyblog.net)
Mindy speaks the truth, it IS F-ing awesome and I say 'Amen' to her statements! I wish it were that easy, and that we could stop right there. We can’t though, we have to keep fighting the good fight until all mothers and fathers have the option to stay at home to raise their children and do so without fear of being “just a…”. Who’s with me?!
I’m in…I promise to take the “just a…” out of my vocabulary and I’ll teach my kids to do the same. Take pride in what you do it has a value—IT HAS A VALUE!“I think we need to make a pact, right here, right now to banish the ‘just a…’ from our description of ourselves…as in ‘just a mom.’” Karen Walrond (chookooloonks.com)
I love that this “momversation” exists and is out there in the universe. If more moms (and dads) jumped on this bandwagon, become more vocal about it and take pride in the fact that they are not “just a…” rather, they are a contributing member of society. They are contributing in a BIG way. Maybe when this happens, we may see a shift in how the universe sees the values.
That is a dream I won’t give up on.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Finding Support in Cyber Spaces
I have quietly been keeping up with the life of an old family friend of mine through her blog (and now website). I've witnessed her trials and tribulations, her successes and difficulties. As I've done so, I've gained so much. Through her experiences and lessons, I've learned to be more patient with myself. I've learned that it's ok to have those "lose control of myself" moments as long as I take a few moments later to reflect and learn from them. I've found an avenue of silent support. I appreciate the stories that she shares. I appreciate her sharing herself and her family's vulnerabilities to help others. It is a remarkable thing.
Within the historical perspectives class-American Motherhood, we have focused on motherhood as it has progressed over the years. In one of the units we discussed how important it is for mothers to have support and how without it, a mother's love can be conflicted, painful and even fatal. Part of that discussion was, where do we find support if those around us aren't filling that role? The blogoshpere was mentioned. I immediately thouht of her blog and the courage and wisdom it has brought to me. With that, I thought a thank you was overdue. So, I wrote her a letter saying, among other things, "thank you for putting yourself out there. I am certain I am not the only one who is inspired and encouraged by your words."
I thanked her for being a part of my support system, even if she didn't realize she was.
I am inspired by her and the many woman who comment on her posts. I am in awe of her courage and faith. All mother's need support and we find it wherever we can. Michelle O'Neil has provided me with support for years and she didn't even know it until today. Her stories are truly inspiring and continue to give me hope that I too can be the best mom I can be. Her stories invoke optimism and faith. She gives me strength. All mother's need a Michelle O'Neil. I hope you've found yours.
Within the historical perspectives class-American Motherhood, we have focused on motherhood as it has progressed over the years. In one of the units we discussed how important it is for mothers to have support and how without it, a mother's love can be conflicted, painful and even fatal. Part of that discussion was, where do we find support if those around us aren't filling that role? The blogoshpere was mentioned. I immediately thouht of her blog and the courage and wisdom it has brought to me. With that, I thought a thank you was overdue. So, I wrote her a letter saying, among other things, "thank you for putting yourself out there. I am certain I am not the only one who is inspired and encouraged by your words."
I thanked her for being a part of my support system, even if she didn't realize she was.
I am inspired by her and the many woman who comment on her posts. I am in awe of her courage and faith. All mother's need support and we find it wherever we can. Michelle O'Neil has provided me with support for years and she didn't even know it until today. Her stories are truly inspiring and continue to give me hope that I too can be the best mom I can be. Her stories invoke optimism and faith. She gives me strength. All mother's need a Michelle O'Neil. I hope you've found yours.
Mom to State: Butt Out!
Recently, I saw an article posted on a friend’s face book page titled, State to mom: Stop baby-sitting neighbors' kids . Upon reading the article, I was instantly outraged. “Really?”, I asked over and over in my mind as I was reading. You see, the Michigan Department of Human Services has decided that a mother agreeing to watch her neighbor’s kids for about an hour or so in the morning before the bus arrived would “be violating a law aimed at the operators of unlicensed day care centers.” As if being a good neighbor, helping out another mom is a crime that should be punished? I must ask the question again, really? Being a working mother is difficult enough without the added pressure the state wants to put on you and your support system.
At what point will societies give moms a break-- both the "stay-at-home" working mom and the "outside-the-home" working mom?
Knowing our kids are safe and get to school safe is a big deal. Having a neighbor kind enough to ensure that it happens so that you have peace of mind is a big deal. The fact that she does it for about an hour each morning should only be a big deal (in a good way) for her and her neighbors--not a big deal (in a bad way) to the state or the lawmakers. A little common sense will tell you the intent of the law they say she is breaking was not meant for her.
Give a mom a break--she's helping to raise the leaders of the future. Do you really need to pick on her? As mom I say stop. Stop picking on the moms in the world who are trying to do the right thing. Stop picking on the mom who is paying attention to her child’s needs and the needs of others. Stop saying no to the mom who is doing society a great service by ensuring that children are safe, rather than out on the streets doing whatever it is unsupervised kids do for about an hour each morning. Stop butting into a situation that clearly was not meant to be included in your day care laws. Common sense goes a long way. Michigan Department of Human Services--If you use a little common sense you would back off and allow this mom to continue with what she's doing. In other words, butt out!
At what point will societies give moms a break-- both the "stay-at-home" working mom and the "outside-the-home" working mom?
Knowing our kids are safe and get to school safe is a big deal. Having a neighbor kind enough to ensure that it happens so that you have peace of mind is a big deal. The fact that she does it for about an hour each morning should only be a big deal (in a good way) for her and her neighbors--not a big deal (in a bad way) to the state or the lawmakers. A little common sense will tell you the intent of the law they say she is breaking was not meant for her.
Give a mom a break--she's helping to raise the leaders of the future. Do you really need to pick on her? As mom I say stop. Stop picking on the moms in the world who are trying to do the right thing. Stop picking on the mom who is paying attention to her child’s needs and the needs of others. Stop saying no to the mom who is doing society a great service by ensuring that children are safe, rather than out on the streets doing whatever it is unsupervised kids do for about an hour each morning. Stop butting into a situation that clearly was not meant to be included in your day care laws. Common sense goes a long way. Michigan Department of Human Services--If you use a little common sense you would back off and allow this mom to continue with what she's doing. In other words, butt out!
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